The sun hasn’t yet risen, and already I’m dreading tonight’s Pizza Hut commercial with Jessica Simpson.
I realize that my passionate anger toward sister Ashlee Simpson probably says more about me than it does about her. God, I hate her, and what has she ever done to me? She bravely battled acid reflux disease and lived to write lyrics taunting Lindsay Lohan. You’d think I’d be a fan.
And I was OK with Jessica for a while, I really was. I guess I found the little shawl she’d wear on “Newlyweds‿ endearing.
But the over-the-top sexuality has finally done it for me. Red boots, short shorts, fishnets? Congratulations on the double D’s, but do you have wear a bra that hoists them over your head?
Previews of the Pizza Hut ad show Jessica reprising her “Dukes of Hazzard‿ look -- bumping, strutting, cooing, and then tossing food into the mouth of some lust-struck sap.
What am I missing? Is it really sexy to have to try that hard?
I would like to see Joe Simpson in fishnets and short-shorts. is that wrong?
The commercials have been getting worse over the years. Sad. I usta watch this just for the ads.
The one year I can remember giving somewhat of a damn about the game -- the year Tampa Bay played (and won) -- was frustrating. If you're watching for the game, AND the ads, you will have no chance to pee for hours.
Tonight I will watch it on The Fella's hi-def, ginormous telly. And I will root for the 'Hawks because I have family in Washington who will be pounding the floor, throwing house slippers at their screen, etc. I also have a bro-in-law in Virginia who loves the 'Hawks. He picked them because he liked the team colors. I am not making this up.
And you should keep blogging.
It's official: By putting you on blog duty we may safely conclude your assignment editor has "turned you out..."
Petrak D.