Until I have established my own disco-ball awards, TV.com's are the next best thing. Here are the results of their online poll, which had 6 million votes. Any quibbles?

BEST MUSIC: Flight of the Conchords

BEST FASHION: Mad Men

WORST PRODUCT PLACEMENT: American Idol

MOST TIRED PREMISE: Reality Dating

SHOWS YOU KNOW STINK WITHOUT EVEN WATCHING: The Celebrity Apprentice

MOST DISTURBING TREND: Semi-Scripted Reality TV

BEST TOUR DE FORCE: - Drea de Matteo in Desperate Housewives

BEST TV THAT TEACHES: Mythbusters

BEST CAST TO GRAB A BEER WITH: 30 Rock

THE REMAKE YOU'D MOST LIKE TO SEE: Facts of Life

SNAPPIEST CATCHPHRASE: "Legen...dary!" Barney, How I Met Your Mother

BEST KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR: Ziva David, NCIS

BEST SIDEKICK: Dwight Schrute, The Office

REALITY STARS YOU WISH WEREN'T REAL: Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag

CHARACTERS YOU WISH WOULD KISS ALREADY: Bones and Booth, Bones

MOST OBVIOUSLY DOOMED COUPLE: - Katherine and Mike, Desperate Housewives

BEST HAIR - GUYS: The Jonas Brothers, JONAS

BEST HAIR - GALS: Alex Russo, Wizards of Waverly Place

CHARACTERS THAT NEED A SPIN-OFF: Barney, How I Met Your Mother

SEXIEST COUPLE: Chuck and Blair, Gossip Girl

Can anyone stand Ashlee Simpson on this show? It was brilliant to cast her as a creepy psychotic, which conveniently explains any bad acting. But I hate her, and not in a fun way. Her scenes seem to be from another show -- specifically, a telenova.

Has Stephanie Jacobsen angered someone powerful in the industry? Her character, Lauren, seems only to exist in order to be humiliated. First, she's been drawn into prostitution to pay for medical school (although it should be noted that she has a respectable rate, as well as an extraordinarily handsome clientele). Now they're making her maid of honor for Riley's wedding? Will the indignities never end?

How could Josie Bissett possibly look that good? Is it possible that she is one of the undead?

Could Katie Cassidy just move to Manhattan and join the "Gossip Girl" gang? She'd certainly give Leighton Meester more of a run for her trust-fund than Michelle Trachtenberg.

It's a good thing I don't have access to any sort of media, because I have a number of complaints I would like to publicize. You would not believe the injustices I suffer on a daily basis. And all the people I hate -- their dastardly deeds are shocking. Shocking.

But Kate Gosselin can appear on any morning talk show she pleases, and today she revealed that Jon had emptied their joint account of more than $200,000, leaving her unable to pay her bills (and the kids' bills).

"I need that money to provide for them," she said. "We were in the position after our sextuplets were born that we could not pay our bills. We did the show to provide a better life for them. Never did I think I'd be back in the same position."

In no way do I mean to belittle the fact that Kate cannot pay her bills. Whether or not she decides to take out a hit on Jon, it would be nice to have the requisite money on hand. But honestly, I'm not worried she will be turned out of her Pennsylvania home to set up camp in the kids' Crooked Houses. I don't think she is, either. She has the law on her side, not to mention TLC.

So embarrassing Jon on TV was just lowering herself to his level. Jon is a jerk; it's getting a little redundant at this point. What else can we hear about this guy that would actually be news? If it's not one of the following, I don't want to hear it.

*Jon has made a porn film with John Wayne Bobbitt, Tonya Harding and Joey Buttafuoco.

*Jon sets himself on fire.

*Jon admits that he slept with David Letterman.

I was tempted to adopt the team known as "The Hot Guys," but I think I'm going to go with the Harlem Globetrotters, strictly on the basis of their names: Flight Time and Big Easy. Their teammates' names include Bam Bam, Bear, Buckets, Blenda, Buckets, Bull and Bones. (Those are just the B's.) I couldn't find a Globetrotters name generator online, but I like "Downtown" for myself, or something involving the word "hack."

The Globetrotters must have a new publicist. This year alone, they've appeared on "Hell's Kitchen," "Jon & Kate Plus Eight" and "The Bachelorette." I enjoyed the idea of having Harlem Globetrotters advise you on your love life. Kind of like having Ellen Degeneres judge on "American Idol."

Globetrotters trivia, according to Wikipedia:

*They were created in 1926 on the South Side of Chicago, but they thought having "Harlem" in the name would create more mystique.

*Honorary Globetrotters include Pope John Paul II, Nelson Mandela, Henry Kissinger, Jesse Jackson and Whoopi Goldberg.

*Magic Johnson and Wilt Chamberlain were both once Globetrotters.

What's your Globetrotter name? And which "Amazing Race" contestants will disgrace themselves with the most distinction?

In Jon Stewart v. Rod Blagojevich, who won? All I can say is that Bonnie Hunt was much, much tougher in calling Blago on his schtick.

I suppose Stewart was being ironic at times, but I can tell you that Blagojevich did not pick up on it.

"I'm not cynical," said Stewart. "I'm skeptical. I've been hurt before. But I'm not cynical. I want to believe you."

Then: "You are a charming dude with the best head of hair I've ever f------ seen. So I want this to be real."

Then he offers to apologize to Blago publicly if he should be vindicated. He also says he would hug him.

"You are Richard Jewell," Stewart says. "I mean it. If this is true..."

"Is that the Atlanta guy? Is that who that is?" asked Blago.

Blago did admit to the swear words. That's about it. Is anyone else out there as convinced as Stewart after reading the book?