Super Bowl commercials are a game-within-a-game, that rare chance for advertisers to compete in front of 110 million-plus viewers huddled around the TV. Opportunities like this don't come along often -- or cheaply, at a reported average of $3.8 million for 30 seconds of airtime. Here's who did -- and didn't -- make the most of it.
TOUCHDOWNS
Ode to farmers
Powerful in its straightforwardness, stripped-down authenticity and subtle patriotism, Ram Truck delivered with its moving two-minute long love letter to those who till the land. It features original photography and the late broadcaster Paul Harvey's "So God Made a Farmer" monologue, read by the legendary broadcaster some three decades ago.
Viva young
Not sure how Betty White avoided a cameo in this Taco Bell gem chronicling a wild night on the town with a bunch of old folks who make Lindsay Lohan seem tame. What made it all the better was the music: the Spanish version of "We Are Young" by fun. This scored as the big game's funniest ad but not the most effective, since I still don't want to eat Taco Bell.
Prom night
A boy goes to prom alone and, inspired by Dad's Audi, plants a big kiss on the prom queen in front of everyone, including her jealous prom king boyfriend. It ends with the boy driving home alone, sporting a big shiner and an even bigger smile. It's like a John Hughes film condensed down to one minute, and I loved every second of it.
FUMBLES
Jared's still thin
What should have been 15 minutes of fame has stretched into 15 years for Jared, a regular guy who lost a lot of weight purportedly thanks to Subway. The shtick is stale, but that didn't stop Subway from celebrating Jared's tenure in its first Super Bowl ad since 2005. Yawn. Would have much preferred a Blimpie's ad starring Lutz.
Panty raid
Rookie Super Bowl advertiser Speed Stick made its big-game debut with an instantly forgettable ad about a guy getting caught holding a pair of underwear belonging to an attractive female laundromat customer. D'oh! If I were responsible for this lackluster ad, I'd be sweating as much as the guy in charge of the Superdome's lights.
Something's fishy
Singing fish aren't funny or interesting. Neither is this commercial featuring a fish serenading a bottle of Beck's Sapphire to a smooth version of "No Diggity." It should have been set to the sound of flushing $3.8 million down the toilet.
Big kiss
I would have rather not seen a close up of model Bar Refaeli kissing that guy, and I certainly didn't need to hear it.
PERSONAL FOAL
As if Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide" isn't tear-jerker enough, Anheuser-Busch took it up a notch with this touching ad about a baby Clydesdale and its trainer. The two reunite on the streets of Chicago (actually Los Angeles doubling as Chicago). The stellar spot was directed by Jake Scott, whose dad, Ridley, oversaw one of the best Super Bowl ads of all time: Apple's "1984."
PENALTY
Yes, sex sells. But enough with the ads that show a beautiful woman reducing men to single-minded idiots dragging their knuckles through their own drool pools. A Motorola commercial had Megan Fox causing mayhem by using her device to send a photo of herself in the tub, covered in suds. More suds came from supermodel Kate Upton, whose Super Bowl preview ad had her blowing bubbles in slo-mo while guys washing a Mercedes went ga-ga. "That really targets their key demographic: 14-year-old boys making $500,000 a year," quipped Stephen Colbert.
UPON FURTHER REVIEW
A couple of spots came under fire -- unjustly, in my opinion -- for having racist overtones. An Arab-American group took issue with the way Arabs were portrayed -- as "foolish camel jockeys," one told Reuters -- in Coke's frenetic "Chase" ad, which pit showgirls, cowboys and a "Mad Max" contingent in a race across the desert. Volkswagen's "Get Happy" got heat for showing an office worker from Minnesota speaking in a Jamaican accent. One critic called it "blackface with voices." Chill, mon.
MOST IMPROVED
Chicago-based Cars.com hired the Chicago office of McGarryBowen to come up with this year's ad about a car-shopping couple who doesn't want any drama. They get it anyway when the car dealer hands them what looks like a puppy but is really a baby wolf. It's not revolutionary but it gets the message across. And it sure is a step up from last year's creepy Cars.com ad where a shopper's confidence springs out of his shoulder in the form of a second head.
Other notable mentions:
Tide's miracle stain
Clever ad but must be painful for San Francisco fans to watch.
Call: Touchdown
Skechers GOrun 2: Man vs. Cheetah
This one is even better than the company's last Super Bowl commercial featuring a cute French bulldog wearing Skechers. The year before that was Kim Kardashian in Skechers, so they keep improving.
The ad is a blend of bona fide nature footage (gazelles really do wink) combined with green-screen technology (the runner tackles and hog ties a life-sized stuffed cheetah toy).
Call: Touchdown
Hyundai: Epic Playdate
The Flaming Lips help a suburban family jazz up a lazy day with the band's trademark over-the-top antics: riding in a space bubble zorb, shooting lasers and launching confetti canons. It's a fun, upbeat ad but not one that I'm dying to watch over and over again.
Call: Touchdown
AXE Apollo: Lifeguard
AXE is launching its Super Bowl debut with a satisfying spot about a woman getting rescued from a shark by a handsome lifeguard. Said life saver is no match for a geeky guy in an astronaut outfit who's walking on the beach. Its young, sexy, irreverent tone is in line with the AXE brand of men's care products. It's a clever way to lure viewers to AXEApollo.com, where they can register for a chance to win a trip into space.
Call: Touchdown
Oreo's whisper fight
One of the few surprises of the night (I've never seen so many ads released in advance of the game), and it worked.
Call: Touchdown
The GoDaddy commercial was terrible. I was watching the game with 4 kids under 11, and the very first commercial break we're all watching together is that explicit (and noisy) kiss. Just Ew. Must we hyper-sexualize the "family hour" of the ballgame? Aren't we creative enough to come up with commercials that don't need sex to sell?
The VW and Tide ads were the best. Everything else was pretty lame. In fact, this year's crop of commercials were some of the most boring and uninteresting that were shown in years.
I liked both of this year's Chevy spots much more than last year's heavy-handed Clint Eastwood spot.
"God Made A Farmer".. Hands Down, The Best! The onbly other ad in the top tier was Jeep's "Whole Again" spot.
I LOVE the one with the robots zapping the aliens!
Robot Betty9
If a singing CGI fish constitutes cool and sexy then yes, guilty as charged.
The Kia Sorento had us "older folks" laughing so much. Where do Babies come from.. is the question every parents dreads the first time it is asked by a child. The wifes expression was hysterical. The spacebaby stuff may have been overboard but the lines were great
Beck's Sapphire Commercial was cool and sexy.. something Lori Rackl knows absolutely nothing about... The cover of No Diggity was sexy by the amazing Chet Faker.
I didn't view it so literally (what if she didn't want to be kissed, etc., which she clearly seemed to not mind, btw). I saw it as wish fulfillment, a victory for the little guy. Who can't relate to the insecure high school kid who, in a fit of bravery, seizes the moment and wins the girl, if only for a few seconds?
Still talking about it is not the same as wanting to buy the product.
Worst bunch of "over the top" fantasies by those who may be overusing the medicinal qualities of pot.
Doritos ad makes me hungry.
Glad you all liked the Audi ad. I thought it looked like sexual assault and would have pressed charges. Lori, would you like it if a strange boy did that to you or your daughter or would you "love every second of it'? Also would you encourage your son to behave that way? Yeah it was just a kiss...until its something else. This is not India or Italy folks, let's protect our daughters.
I liked the Ram ad with the farmer tribute and the Audi ad very much. I didn't see the other ones you touted. But the very best ad I saw was a local station ad for Krystal's new bacon cheese slider.
This year was BY FAR the worst year of Super Bowl ads I've seen. The only real funny one was the one with Seth Rogen and Paul Rudd for Samsung. Most ads left my wife & myself just scratching our heads saying "who approved dumping $4MM on that crap"?? And here we go with Budweiser again.....this time around it is "Black Gold" or whatever they call this new beer of theirs.....in the past we've seen Bud Dry......Bud Ice.....Budweiser Select......Bud Light Lemon......and on and on. And they always vanish after a year or two. Just realize people like Bud and Bud Light and move on.
Yet, you're talking about it right now...
God made a farmer brought a tear to my eye. I might even consider buying a Ram pickup next time. What a great ad! Paul Harvey was a heck of a radio man.
The infamous Apple ad of 1984 was in fact a flagrant copyright violation of the George Orwell novel '1984' , which is still under copyright. The Estate sent a cease-and-desist letter to Apple and it's ad agency, and the ad was never shown again.
The GoDaddy ad wasn't that great. The first showing, I thought aloud, why do we need to hear all the slobber that goes into the kiss? Is this an ad for porn site or a hosting site? Easily forgettable.