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TV review: MTV's 'Jersey Shore,' season two

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'Jersey Shore'
Three stars
9 p.m. Thursday on MTV

If someone asked me, "What's wrong with America?," I would probably answer, "Snooki Polizzi." It was around the time that Snooki was Twittering with John McCain about Obama's evil tanning tax that I realized things had gone too far.

In a just world, the cast of "Jersey Shore" should not wield this much influence. But there's no turning back now, and I'll admit it: God, I've missed them.

Despite reported salary issues, MTV has reunited the whole gang and imported them to Miami for a second season. It's hard to imagine a life form more primal. They preen for potential mates, snarl and lash out at enemies, and dance until they pass out. How can you not watch?

Among the attractions this season . . .

New vocabulary!
We learn what a "double bagger" is. "Sometimes you gotta put a bag over your head, in case her bag falls off," explains a friend of Ronnie's.

New fashions!
J-WOWW, who is truly a busty marvel of nature, interviews while wearing a cocktail umbrella behind her ear.

New conflicts!
Angelina, who left the house last season, has been invited back to stir up trouble. (And share her Brazilian bikini wax with the cameras.)

Overall, I don't have too many complaints. But if you're a fan of the fantasy "Real World" houses, I should warn that you'll be disappointed. The aesthetic highlight here is blue astro turf. And what's with the decision to go with grainy, '70s-porn-era film quality? Is MTV afraid we can't handle the caked-on makeup in high definition?

Never let it be said, though, that the cast doesn't show growth. Since we last saw Snooki, she's become a one-man woman. "I found an amazing gorilla juice-head!" she gushes. His name is Emilio.

She's not going to cheat on him in Miami, either. "I don't want to cheat," she explains. "But if you're going to hand me a bottle of frickin' SoCo, something just comes over me."

I mean, let's be real, right?

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1 Comment

Dear Jersey Shore Cast,
Love the show,but can I say for the Men you guys kill me, I mean all of you are about sex and your players.I honestly wished that MTV made every one of you go to visit people that contacted a disease just to open your eyes that this could happen to you. I understand you wanna have fun who doesn't.But everyone of you are good looking people wouldn't you hate to wake up and find out damn I got AIDS does this make sence? Sammi & Ron you make a good couple,but Ron truely realize the good woman you have seriously. She is someone you bring home to moma ya know. Your not getting any younger and when your truely ready to settle down and find that special someone you just might have lost her. So hold on to her and get your prioritys straight for real. Again I love the show hugs to you all Paula

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This page contains a single entry by Paige Wiser published on July 28, 2010 4:06 AM.

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