SATURDAY

"Royal Pains" marathon (8 a.m.-3 p.m., USA): Nothing says "summer" like staying in all day to watch rich people take ill in the Hamptons.

"Lost" (7 p.m., WLS-Channel 7): You could look for additional meaning in a rerun of the two-hour series finale - or you could give your brain a much-deserved break.

"The Calendar Girl Murders" (7 p.m., Reelz): Centerfolds are being slaughtered! Hard to resist this 1984 classic, with Sharon Stone, Tom Skerritt, Robert Culp, Robert Morse and Alan Thicke.

"Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night 2" (9:30 p.m., WCIU-Channel 26): Svengoolie starts at a special time because "The Wiz" runs a little long. It's worth the wait. "Why rent a limo, when you'll end up with a hearse?" he asks. Watch for the characters' last names in the 1987 slash-o-rama. They're all named after cult film directors: Wood, Craven, King, Romero, Waters, Carpenter...

SUNDAY

"Triathlon: Escape From Alcatraz" (4 p.m., WLS-Channel 7): Take a moment this Memorial Day weekend to be grateful . . . that you're not athletic.

"The Marines" (5:30 p.m., WTTW-Channel 11): John Grant's 2007 documentary is followed by live coverage of the National Memorial Day Concert. It's hosted by Chicagoans Gary Sinise and Joe Mantegna, with appearances from Colin Powell, Lionel Richie, Brad Paisley and Dennis Haysbert.

"Eight-Limbed Baby" (8 p.m., TLC): It's followed by "Paralyzed & Pregnant With Twins" at 9. Say what you want, but TLC knows its audience.

"Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace" (8 a.m., Spike): Watch the whole saga, in episodic order, until 3 a.m. Thank God for commercial breaks.