"What could be more stressful?" asks Podrazik. "It would be tough enough in a regular job setting. Add thousands of total strangers peeking in, success riding on your performance, and financial pressures around every corner."

And that's why the TV schedule includes "Divorce Court."

Just this week, we have the second-season premiere of ABC's "Here Come the Newlyweds" (Monday) and the CW's new "Hitched or Ditched" (Tuesday).

In "Here Come the Newlyweds," adorable couples are asked to test their love for a cash prize that's at least $100,000. The tasks include husband against wife on the paintball field; squeezing a series of male butts, blindfolded, to identify your husband; and living with a camera above your bed.

"That's just plain stupid," says Dr. Leslie Seppinni, a licensed marriage family therapist, about the bedroom cam.

The more sensationalistic "Hitched or Ditched" has found couples who are ready to take the plunge - or break up. It could go either way. They have one week to plan the wedding, and then they decide whether they want to spend the rest of their lives together. At the altar. In front of all their loved ones.

"This is impulsive and reckless for any relationship," says Seppinni.

There are some shows on TV that illustrate realistic, healthy marriages - Seppinni is a fan of "Friday Night Lights" - but they're certainly not in this bunch.

"These TV shows are too corrupted by the cameras," says Seppinni. "People are acting outrageously, doing things that they'd never do in real life. It's a shame because so many young adults are watching these shows, who do not have a lot of life experience and whose expectations are being elevated to extreme levels. None of these shows are indicative of 'real life.'"

Pretty much everyone outside the entertainment industry agrees with her. "It is reality soap opera," says Mary Jo Barrett, founder and owner of the Center for Contextual Change in Skokie. "It certainly does not illustrate realistically the potential for a happy functional life." The couples cast on the shows are picked because they aren't like everyone else. "They are different, really rich, really beautiful, huge amounts of kids, wild lives," says Barrett. "We don't watch regular people doing regular life. In fact that would probably be boring."

Barrett doesn't go so far as to blame the cameras for marriage problems. "What drives them to be on the tube drives their marriage down the tube," she says. "The need for fame, the need for adoration, the need to be noticed, the need for drama, addiction to excitement, enjoy being recognized -- certainly the money."

On Tuesday, "Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood" returns to Oxygen. Depending on how optimistic you are about the future of Tori Spelling's relationship - admit it, you're worried - we could include this show under the "marital agony" umbrella.

Not to jinx anything, but here are a few more names of married couples who starred on reality shows:

Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson.
Britney Spears and Kevin Federline.
Carmen Electra and Dave Novarro.
Gretchen and Danny Bonaduce.
Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler.
Kathy Griffin and Matt Moline.

I hope I'm not the one to break it to you, but those couples are no longer together.

Tori and Dean may not have had a fairy-tale beginning - they were both married to other people when they fell in love on the set of a Lifetime movie - but there's still hope for them, thinks Podrazik, the author of Watching TV. "A tip of the hat to the old-time couples that did work well together, long term," he says. George Burns and Gracie Allen reportedly had a love even bigger than their ratings. More recently, "thirtysomething" power couple Ken Olin and Patricia Wettig made it work - although they weren't married to each other on camera.

And then there's the very curious case of "Jon & Kate Plus 8." We'll be seeing a fifth season of the well populated Gosselin family beginning Monday at 8 p.m. on TLC. And the issues will be much more complicated than potty training the septuplets.

Ambivalent patriarch Jon has been accused of cheating on his wife while she tours the country in support of her latest book, Eight Little Faces. The show has clearly been good for their bank account, but a recent "Saturday Night Live" joke suggested that the next season will bring us "Jon Plus 4" and "Kate Plus 4."

Dr. Seppinni will not be watching. "Jon and Kate need to take a step back from their show, breathe, and go to counseling," she says. "They have eight kids that need their parents and they need to fight like hell to see if they can stay together."

Seppinni suggests that they regroup and see what their family is made of. "Are they for better or for worse, or are they bailing?"

Ratings are one things, but the repercussions for this family - and the children - could be devastating. "No one should have to watch their life fall apart on TV," says Seppinni.

And on June 7 begins a new season of "Bridezillas." In case you still hadn't given up on love.
"'Bridezillas' showcases how ugly a relationship can get," says Seppinni. The realism hits close to home for just about anyone who's had to live through a wedding. It brings out the worst in lovers. "Some of these couples are getting married because they are so far in it, they can't back out," says Seppinni. "The men often feel bullied by the women, which sets a precedent for how conflict is handled later in the marriage."

If there's still a marriage.

Podrazik thinks that the "marital agony" genre should not be classified as reality tv, but "alternate reality TV." "It's no more real than the soapy complications of a telenovela," he says.

And yet. Even in these most extreme circumstances, occasionally a moment of genuine affection can slip through production and reach the audience.

"Then in spite of the artifice," says Podrazik, "you walk away with a warm feeling and the thought, 'Yeah, I'd like that, too.'"