Chicago Sun-Times
The scoop from Washington

Sweet blog special: Bush to Minneapolis on Saturday.


WASHINGTON--This just in from the White House...


Oh, good Lord!

Those poor Minnesotans really only want a check! It need not be hand delivered! Federal Express is just fine! REALLY!!!

They were sufficiently horrified by Dumya's last plunge of his entire foot down his throat all the way to the sphincter of his colon during his last rant in the Rose Garden that fateful Thursday. Most of America is still more sickened from that experience than we are hurt by the tragedy of the loss of life. We can now appreciate why poor Laura has to guzzle 32 ounce jugs of Maalox to wash back all the Prozac her marriage has driven her to abuse during the course of this wretched Presidency.

Minnesota got the message Thursday: this tragedy was the wrath of GOD because of the liberal Democratic Governor's being in the same party as Bill Clinton, who was too busy getting his wick waxed to realize all this crap was going to fall on Republican shoulders after 2000. See, had Bill been paying closer attention to the Magic 8-ball and more conscientiously correlating that intelligence with both Nostradamus and St. John the Revelator, America wouldn't be in this pickle. At any rate, that was the Presidential interpretation Dumya got from the message Tony Snowjob left on his Blackberry voicemail from Jesus.

Minnesotans simply want him to send the freaking check, and NOT SPEAK! PLEASE! NO MORE TALKING, PLEASE!!!!

At a time of crisis, it is up to our government to help its people to regain composure and aid them in assistance. However, time and time again, this administration has done little for its people during time of disasters and great chaos. It is a shame how little the American government has helped people out of poverty and disaster. Instead, the government continues to create poverty and violence abroad in Iraq. As one of the nations pledge to eliminate world poverty and hunger in the Millennium Project, the government is doing very little to uphold that promise. According to the Borgen Project, whose goal is to fight global poverty, the US government has spent $340 billion dollars on the war. However, it only takes $19 billion dollars annually to end world poverty. This government needs a new direction and a new leader. And we have to start making poverty a leading political issue in the White House.

Leave a comment

Get the Sweet widget

More widgets


Lynn Sweet

Lynn Sweet is a columnist and the Washington Bureau Chief for the Chicago Sun-Times.

Stay in touch

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Lynn Sweet published on August 2, 2007 4:05 PM.

Sweet blog special: Nuke? No nuke? Obama works to define position. UPDATE. Dodd says Obama "confused." was the previous entry in this blog.

Sweet blog special: Iowa tie. New poll shows Obama likeable, honest--but inexperienced. is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.