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Writing a post about something absurd or off-the-wall or inappropriate that Charles Barkley says is almost the blog equivalent of breathing air: It takes almost no effort or thought and happens almost every second of every day.

Case in point: Sir Charles decided to goof on Sammy Sosa's recent skin rejuvenation project that has him looking like something out of the "Thriller" video. So, during the TNT NBA show Thursday night, Barkley, who proclaimed, "I know you want to get in the Hall of Fame, but going white ain't the way to do it!," eventually took to transforming himself into a white man - a process slowed significantly by the continued flapping of his jaw while the makeup person efforted away.

No, on the grand scale, this isn't up there with any Northwestern blackface screwup. But has the Round Mound of Rebound stepped over the line? Nevermind the discussion of whether he'll be able to eat fried chicken and chitluns after he's white. Or is this just another case of Charles being Charles?

Oh, and Chuck, the cops didn't pull you over for driving while black. They pulled you over because you were hammered while looking for some oral pleasure. Just sayin'.

In the third period of Wednesday night's game against the Vancouver Canucks, Willie Mitchell came out of the penalty box at just the wrong time for the Chicago Blackhawks.

Jonathan Toews was on the receiving end of a brutal Mitchell hit near center ice that ended the Blackhawk captain's night early.

Canucks fans will bemoan the fact that the ensuing skirmish stopped play while the team was on a two-on-none fast break. Kris Versteeg was sent to the penalty box for roughing while avenging Toews' demise.

"It was a clean hit," Blackhawks coach Joel Quenneville said after the game. "He didn't see (Mitchell) coming."

Vancouver ended up coming back to win 3-2. Toews, meanwhile, will be evaluated today.

Michael Jordan and his "devil" shoe. (AP)

The Cult of the Air Jordan is a passionate one. Since the first release of Michal Jordan's iconic shoe line in 1985, Nike has managed to develop a dedication of follower that borders on frenzy - do a Google search for "Air Jordan" and gaze at the 33,000,000+ links for proof if you have a few spare minutes.

Each year a new high top is rolled out to the delight of the fashion-aware ballers, hipsters, trendsters and collectors - mostly long gone are the days when you could get jacked up for you Mikes, even thought they still command a mighty price.

Nike's Jumpman23 site is, yes, above all a marketing/advertising push for you to fork over your hard-earned dollars for a tennis shoe. But at least they do it in a cool way. Not least of the interesting features is this new timeline feature that takes you through the years of Air Jordan with interesting videos, photos and facts about the man who could fly.

Bears wide receiver Johnny Knox electrified the Soldier Field crowd Sunday with a 102-yard kickoff return to begin the second half. But it's a uncommonly speedy ballboy who's continuing to raise some eyebrows in the aftermath.

The as-yet-unnamed ballboy kept pace with Knox as he raced down the field, even outpacing some members of the Lions' kick coverage team.

The 24-year-old, identified by ESPN 1000's Waddle & Silvy Show as Darryl MaGee of Champaign, called into the show this morning. He told hosts Marc Silverman and Tom Waddle that he found out from friends that a highlight of him keeping pace with Knox was blowing up.

On his Twitter account MaGee said, "Man I'm all over the internet and ESPN now!!!!! I  definately [sic] didn't expect this!":

 

On a day when the Chicago Bears, the NFL and anyone who ever loved the game pays tribute to Walter Payton - the 10th anniversary of his death in 1999 from bile duct cancer - it seems fitting to simply sit back and take in what made Sweetness so great. So memorable.

The Bears put together a nice video tribute, played at halftime, to the Hall of Famer that lets his friends, teammates and coaches speak to his greatness as a player and a person. One of the toughest, most elusive, most determined players in the history of the game, Payton was as well-known as a prankster as he was a hard-nosed football player.

Some great moments and memories to savor.

You can say what you want about Chad "Ocho Cinco" Johnson - and pretty much every angle has been covered. He's talented, mercurial, off-putting, arrogant, annoying, selfish, entertaining ... blah blah blah.

Been covered.

But this is actually pretty cool of him, even if there is, of course, a huge self-centered aspect to it. See, Ocho Cinco has turned himself into quite the lifecaster. Using Twitter, Facebook, Ustream video broadcasting and other measures, he puts himself on display as much as possible, using the various platforms to chat with fans and get himself spread across the Internet.

And it's the Twitter aspect that comes into play here.

Johnson has expressed interest in live tweeting during games for the Cincinnati Bengals, a notion the NFL has flatly ruled out. So instead, he's devised a contest for his Twitter followers where he'll fly one fan to each home game - don't count on any playoffs, people, this is the Bengals - to be his designated Twitter stenographer. Through a series of hand signals, Johnson will get his message out - or try to - and give a fan a chance to see the game up close and personal.

And, of course, he promises some end zone shenanigans, which is no surprise coming from one of the more innovative touchdown celebrators in the league.

Is this much ado about nothing? Yeah. But really it's just a bit of subversive fun at the end of the day. And, of course, if it bothers you ... don't follow and you won't be harmed.

How Chad Ochocinco plans to tweet during NFL games (Mashable)

Bolivia's answer to the Red Sox-Yankees rivalry was taken to another level last weekend when things got ugly at the Oriente Petrolero-Blooming futbol match.

Oriente's -- enraged after taking an elbow to the dome -- sent a vicious flying ninja kick to Leonardo Medina's head. Medina fell to the ground unconscious and subsiquently sent to 12 days of bed rest. Jauregui did what most ninjas do after delivering a flying kick in front of a full stadium: he went into hiding.

Why does any discussion of NBA basketball - specifically, the Bulls - still start and end with the words: Michael Jordan? Because the greatest player ever - no disrespect, Wilt - still has game.

Just check out the video above with a 46-year-old, puffy Jordan sporting some truly baggy jeans facing up Chris "The Ghetto Bird" Young, dropping fadeaway after fadeaway over the 6-foot-4, 180-pound 34-year-old.

And if that weren't enough, he starts off with a flat-footed reverse slam from under the basket, a feat Slamball star Young can't do facing forward.

Of course, Jordan talks trash the entire time, asking Young to tell him which side he wants to defend, then knocking down shots from right there. "How many times you gotta see it," you can here a teammate ask from the side.

You can just smell the edge - Jordan's laughing and joshing, but he wants to beat this guy and wants him to know he got beat.

So, does this set us up for another comeback? Can the Bulls line up his Airness, maybe just leave him on the bench til the fourth quarter or the final 5 minutes of a game? OK, maybe we're not there. But it's pretty clear Jordan still has skills you can only dream about and clearly still has the competitive fire that made him the greatest.

Jordan grounds the Ghetto Bird (Slam)

Hiroki Kuroda raises his arms as he's carted off the field after being hit in the head with a line drive Saturday night. Below, he lies on the mound as his teammates and trainers look on. (AP photos)

Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Hiroki Kuroda was struck in the head by a line drive off the bat of Arizona Diamondbacks pinch-hitter Rusty Ryal Saturday night and was carted off the field.

The ball hit the right-hander on the right side of the head and rocketed into foul territory. The 34-year-old was placed on a stretcher and taken off the field, but was able to raise both of his arms as he exited.

After the game, Dodgers trainer Stan Conte was quoted saying a CT scan of Kuroda's head "came back negative, no fracture, no bleeding. The doctors feel very, very good and, in fact, the doctors at the hospital didn't even want to keep him overnight, but we thought it would be best just to make sure."

Ryal was awarded a ground-rule double and James McDonald relieved Kuroda.

"It was just shocking," Dodgers manager Joe Torre said. "It certainly caught everybody off guard."

Ryal stopped at first base, then returned to the Arizona dugout while Kuroda was being treated on the mound.

"You get that sick feeling in your stomach," said Ryal, playing in his fifth major league game. "I was just scared. I'm sure everyone else in the stadium, probably even his teammates, have got to be feeling pretty gut-wrenching about it."

Ryal said he sent a message to the Dodgers' clubhouse wishing Kuroda a speedy recovery.

"One of the first things he asked out there was if anybody caught the ball out there, if it was an out," Conte said. "Amazingly, things look really pretty good. The fact that he didn't lose consciousness is a very good sign."

Conte said the club decided to keep Kuroda at the hospital as a precaution.

"We worry about, even though there's no bleeding now, that there could be in the next 12, 14 hours," Conte said. "That's why we want to keep him at the hospital. The first 12-to-24 hours is important. The doctors feel very, very good."

Another night game at Wrigley Field, another idiot fan throwing stuff on the field. This time, though, taking it the extra mile, dumping a beer on the Philadelphia Phillies' centerfielder Shane Victorino in the fifth inning of a 12-5 drubbing Wednesday night.

Of course, this is hardly the first time - and, sadly, probably not the last - that a Cubs night game has turned into a farce because of an idiot fan, too boozed up to class up the joint. Of course security intervened, though whether they got the right guy is in question, but that's not the point. This stuff shouldn't be happening.

There have been charges of racist taunts from the bleachers. We've seen trash dumped on the field. There's the general raucous frat boy atmosphere that permeates night games, particularly in the bleachers.

What gives? Why can't fans cheer and boo, as they have every right to do, without resorting to drunken hooliganism? Is it time to simply ban booze from the Bud Light Bleachers altogether? Because there are clearly at least a handful of idiots who can't handle a couple $6 brews at the ballgame.

We've seen this behavior during national telecasts and in high-profile games, like this late-season contest against the World Series Champion Phillies, and unfortunately it's building a reputation for Cubs fans outside the Friendly Confines that's anything but what we want.

Classless.

Drunks.

Poor fans.

Is that what we want? Is that something you're happy with Cubs fans?

And if you're one of the types who insists this gives home-field advantage or makes us look like a tough sports city, you probably also think you're the funny one being a loudmouth at the bar with your buddies egging you on when all you really are is a loudmouth jerk making an ass of yourself.

Stay classy Bleacher Bums. And keep your trash - and your beer - to yourself.