Tony Romo's "Stairway to Heaven" includes Jessica Simpson. (AP)
Eastern Illinois alum and ditzy blond "pop singing talent" enthusiast Tony Romo celebrated his 29th birthday April 21. But what to get the guy who has everything, including a star on his helmet?
Well a boat, of course, you big silly.
Make that $100,000 worth of speed boat from Joe's daughter, or so says the National Enquirer.
But this isn't just any boat, the pal points out. The custom 25-foot Malibu Wakesetter has a 450 horsepower motor.
"Tony loves speed, and with all of the horsepower in his new boat, he can go as fast as anyone on the lake," said the pal.
Jessica, 28, had the boat delivered to the house the couple shares in the Dallas area, where Tony's posse gathered for an impromptu party.
The gossip rag and tracker of ET goes on to suggest that Jessica is trying to buy her way into a wedding with the zippy gift, allegedly telling friends that Tony's need for speed is the key to a pricey ring on her finger:
Now to name the ride. How about the Double D? Joe Simpson would certainly approve. And let's just hope Tony learned his lesson from fellow Texas boating enthusiast Cedric Benson. Keep the containers closed.