At first, I found it odd that the Daily would choose new Cub Aaron Heilman as the subject of such a profile -- he seems relatively harmless.
Not so much.
It appears Heilman, much like the polarizing ex-Bears QB Rex Grossman, was frequently the object of boo-birds' lack of affection at Shea Stadium.
Heilman is currently busy in Arizona making his case to be the Cubs' fifth starter. He's got plenty of competition between Sean Marshall and Jeff Samardzija
"Good ridance to this choke aritst."
"I don't think the Mets ever gave him a fair shot."
"Now that he's in Chicago he'll have a hard time starting.. but if he does and is successful.. he'll make the Mets look like idiots."
"Aaron Heilman is a guy I would love to help me locate a book in a library or the nice guy behind the counter at Wal Greens, not my pitcher in any capacity. He has the tenacity of a poodle. He's weak minded."
(I'm guessing "weak minded" is another way of calling someone a "mental midget.")
My favorite comment, however, and perhaps the smartest:
"What an absolutely pointless piece..."
So as Cub fans bid farewell to the ire-inducing Bobby Howry, they welcome Aaron Heilman as this year's potential scapegoat. Because goats, as we all know, will always have a home at Wrigley.