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Violent Cub fans could learn a lot from Kevin's mom

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Reminders are everywhere for Cub fans that their franchise has suffered 100 years of ineptitude. (Al Podgorski/Sun-Times)

Accounts of Cub fans becoming notably more violent than usual have sprouted up (here and here) in the past couple of days.

Cub fans getting drunk and disorderly is nothing new. Some might say it's a responsibility. But I've also noticed a few incidents in and around Wrigleyville lately that I don't remember seeing last year. Dudes yelling, shoving, taunting and generally drunkenly interacting in a way that could be viewed as negative is -- in this author's view -- on the rise commensurate with the heating up of the pennant race.

I have a theory about this: Stress.

Has there ever been a more stressful time for Cubs fans? We have the proverbial pieces in place, but those pieces happen to be brittle, blistery and breakable.

Furthermore, you can't hear mention of the Cubs without the number 100 and the words 'years since they last won the World Series' attached. Logic says not to worry -- the team is mathematically bound to win it all some day. Emotion says we're screwed. And emotion, as we all know, is what drives us to beat the eye out of a fan of a rival sports team.

And let us not forget the trickle down effect that it's had throughout the Cubs farm system. Even the Peoria Chiefs are not immune to Cubbie stress. However, they may be stressed more by the Peoria City Council's inability to pass a budget without input from Joe Public.

I offer this advice to fellow Cub fans: Hit a wall. Hit a pillow. Just don't hit another fan.

My mother used to routinely chide my older, beefier brother: "Don't hit. He's smaller than you." This applies to fans of other sporting organizations. Cub fans, other fans are smaller than you -- aren't they?

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Kevin, you are simply too intellegent, too caring, and too logical to be a cubs fan. You could stay at home and have a smaller scale cubs game by doing the following. Get a jar. Fill it with 100 hornets. (paint them cubs fan blue for more realism) Screw on the jar lid and shake rapidly. Enjoy your tabletop cubs game.

I appreciate the kind words and suggestion. But are the hornets the fans or the players? Sometimes, I can't tell myself. I can say with certainty, however, that I have felt stung by both at various points this season.

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This page contains a single entry by Kevin Allen published on July 30, 2008 12:27 PM.

Revenge a dish best served synthetic was the previous entry in this blog.

Cubs, Sox not exactly keeping things uniform is the next entry in this blog.

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