Yes, the audio quality is poor, but you get the idea.
You may have seen the new KFC Double Down Chicken Sandwich by now, a 1,200-calorie adventure in misaligned dietary goals. This is the monstrosity promising a bacon sandwich with cheese and sauce slapped between two slabs of fried chicken - in lieu of bread.
Don't bother rolling yourself to any Chicago KFCs just yet for a taste of the last meal of your life, though, as it's currently only being test marketed in Nebraska and Rhode Island, apparently. But don't worry, it'll likely be in the Midwest before you can say triple bypass.
The drunk food appeal of this death platter aside, it's an amazing menu item - and not the good kind of amazing. At a time when the country is embroiled in a fierce debate over the cost of health care and obesity continues to put our fatness at the forefront of a public health pandemic, this is apparently the answer at least one fast food corporation has come up with to help society: JUST GIVE UP.
KFC for its part is being very secretive about the sandwich - there's no mention on its Web site about the behemoth and even dietary information is sketchy.
And what does $5 taste like? A Foodgeek reviewer breaks it down (complete with horrific photos:
That's it? That is the sandwich? That's not worth five dollars.
Oh... oh my God. That is the best thing ever. I don't know what "Colonel's Sauce" is, but it is like a party in my mouth. This is completely worth the five dollars. Unfortunately I'm going to end up weighing 700 lbs after this, but it is simply amazing.
Right. So when the Devil comes to Earth, he's apparently delicious.
Of course, the health community is aghast at the Double Down, decrying the lack of corporate responsibility in the face of the aforementioned health concerns in AMerica now. There's even the possibility of some sort of fast food or fat tax tied to health care reform to penalize American eaters for subjecting the system to undue costs for scarfing just this sort of thing.
Overreaction? Appropriate outrage? All too much to swallow? Who knows, but one thing's for sure - this is yet another reason why This Is Why You're Fat is becoming less funny and more like a coroner's report on cause of death.
And worst of all, they stole the idea from "30 Rock"!