Over-sharing
Where's the line that marks a person's crossing over into serious over-sharing territory?
Like beauty, over-sharing is, perhaps, in the eye of beholder. Which means it's quite subjective. What might be an interesting personal tidbit to you could be a major dose of Too Much Information to me. (OK, actually, the reverse is likely to be true. I have a sick fascination for the too-personal things that people share when they let their guard down. Or, you know, have a long lunch with a reporter.)
Women, clearly, share more than men. And younger people share more than older people. And people who are in the public eye, well, let's just say they're generally not shy. About anything.
So it's probably no surprise that NBC5 anchor Marion Brooks decided it was totally OK to share with visitors to her video blog the very graphic details of giving birth to and nursing her new daughter.
Rob Feder writes about it in his column today. (If you've got Windows Media, you can also check out the video itself on WMAQ's website, here.)
She discusses, among other things, the pain and difficulty of breast-feeding. She doesn't really say why she's sharing this information, but I'm betting on some combination of the standard responses: "I wish someone had told me this stuff!" and "People do seem to be interested."
I was lucky enough, if "lucky" is really the right term, to have someone tell me most of that stuff, but that's really the very happy coincidence of my best friend helpfully getting pregnant about 6 months before I did. She's been an incredible test-case/field researcher. And, really, I happen to believe that nipple information is generally something you should be getting from a close friend or relative, not from a news anchor. (Call me old fashioned.)
I'm more interested in the second line of reasoning, that it's OK to share really personal information because, well, people do seem to want to know. Some people.
Since first mentioning my own pregnancy in a column, I've gotten tons of great letters and e-mails from people full of congratualtions and unsolicited (but generally quite useful) advice. I also got one e-mail, this weekend, from someone who asked, "Is every column now going to be about your pregnancy? If that's the case I'm done reading it. . . . God I miss Mike Royko!"
So far, I haven't responded to this message. Mostly, I'm not sure how I should. First, I guess I'd say that we all miss Mike Royko, or at least everyone except the family members he neglected throughout his long career. And, second, I'd point out that writing a column about modern fatherhood didn't seem like a tough call on Father's Day weekend. Oh, and third, no, not every column. Not last week's. And probably not next week's. But some.
Still, I see this person's point. It wasn't so long ago that the word "pregnant" wasn't even uttered in mixed company. To have someone writing about it from a relatively personal perspective (though, not quite Marion Brooks personal, I assure you) on page 2 of the newspaper could be slightly disconcerting.
There aren't a lot of ground rules, so I often feel like I'm just making this up as I go along -- sharing the stuff that I think has some larger meaning within this particular cultural moment and, mostly, keeping the nipple details to myself. That seems about right.
Comments
I imagine that after a journalist has testified in a federal corruption trial about her five-year affair with the married mayor of Atlanta -- especially how he paid for their out-of-town getaways with cash that the feds said came from contractors' bribes [http://tinyurl.com/ru3z3] -- one is much less inhibited regarding breast feeding.
But I'm just guessing.
PICKETT replies: You make an excellent point. I was going to mention the whole mayor-of-Atlanta thing, but, uncharacteristically, I shied away from it, perhaps out of some odd sense of decorum. Thanks for setting the record straight.
Posted by: So-Called "Austin Mayor" | June 20, 2006 11:54 AM
I hope Austin Mayor lives a squeaky clean life. The mama just had a baby. Her whole life is wrapped around that right now. When my wife was pregnant, it seemed like 80% of women were. I think if your body is that sore in a particular place, it's probably the story of your day, or week or however long it is before someone gives you the magic potion that makes the pain go away. A year from now she'll look back and wonder if so much "nipple talk" was a good idea.Yet her closest friends will still be warned by her in a whisper. Having a new baby is a big event. Any life changing event may make you change your communication standards for a while. At least she didn't name her baby after a UFO, a fruit, or an obscure country. Deb, write about whatever you want, it's all good!
Posted by: kfitz | June 20, 2006 05:08 PM
I don't lead a squeaky clean life.
I also don't have affairs -- or try to use children to rehabilitate my reputation.
Such as it is.
Posted by: So-Called "Austin Mayor" | June 22, 2006 08:44 PM