Chicago Sun-Times
Tuning in with Thomas Conner

Madonna, “Hard Candy” (Warner Bros.) [3.5 STARS]

| 5 Comments | No TrackBacks

Although she’ll turn 50 in August, the mouthful of sweets that is Madonna Louise Ciccone Ritchie proves with her new album “Hard Candy” that she’s nowhere close to relinquishing her crown as the queen of dance-pop -- or abandoning her favorite role as pop music’s most hot-to-trot coquette.

Surveying the unnamed pack of (much) younger challengers to the throne -- among them Nelly Furtado, Britney Spears, Gwen Stefani and Christina Aguilera -- Maddy turns to us midway through the new disc and declares over a Chic-worthy riff that, “She’s not me/She doesn’t have my name/She’ll never have what I have/It won’t be the same!”

Sugary dance-pop is sugary dance-pop, you might argue, and it’s a young girl’s game. Is there really that much value in a name? Well, Live Nation certainly thinks so.

Last October, the concert giant announced a “360-degree mega-deal” with the diva, prompting her to leave her longtime label -- “Hard Candy” is her last new effort for Warner Bros. -- and grant Live Nation oversight of, to quote the press release, “the Madonna brand, albums, touring, merchandising, fan club and Web site, DVDs, music-related television and film projects and associated sponsorship agreements.”

The Madonna brand -- that certainly says it all, doesn’t it? Over the last quarter-century, it has sold 250 million albums worldwide, doing for the pop charts what McDonald’s did for hamburgers. But Maddy’s corporate enterprise has taken some hard knocks of late. Her last effort, the Brit-affected “Confessions on a Dance Floor,” sold 12 million copies in 2005, but less than 2 million of those were in her native U.S. Before that came “American Life,” the 2003 stinker even the faithful were hard pressed to defend.

In order to justify Live Nation’s love, meriting a deal worth an estimated $120 million over the next decade, Madonna needed to deliver the goods as well as she ever has with her 11th studio album, which arrives in stores on April 28, but is already leaking all over the Net. And deliver she does: “Hard Candy” is her strongest and most enjoyable album since the heavy-breathing “Erotica,” the 1992 disc that remains her high point, mainly because all that heavy breathing was a little less creepy back when she was 33.

Setting out to craft a good-time return to the dance floor, Madonna broke with her well-established formula. Instead of reaching into the underground to plunder the newest dance sounds with the help of a hip and as-yet largely unknown producer such as Jellybean Benitez, William Orbit, Mirwais Ahmadzai or Stuart Price, she turned to two of the biggest names on the U.S. pop charts, Timbaland and Pharrell Williams.

Augmented by Justin Timberlake and Nate “Danja” Hills, Timbaland crafted five of these tracks, while Williams and his Neptunes team handled seven. In various combinations, these fellows also helmed hits by Stefani, Furtado and Spears, though for the last few years, they’ve produced more generic garbage than sheer genius. Thankfully, “Hard Candy” is a return to form for both of them, as well.

This is important because actual singing ability has always been the least of Madonna’s talents -- with poetic or merely passable lyrics ranking a close second -- and the Material Girl is only ever as good as her producers. Here, they try to be as melodic and groovy as possible in a sort of generic, could-be-’70s disco, could-be-’90s techno party-hearty way. Both bring along their sonic trademarks -- Timbaland his booming shout-outs, Williams his vocodered vocals -- and noted pals, including Timberlake, who duets with or backs the star on four tracks, and Chicagoan Kanye West, who pops up for a rap cameo on “Beat Goes On.”

Each producer only ventures out on new turf once. Timbaland succeeds with “Devil Wouldn’t Recognize You,” which sounds like a futuristic take on the AM-radio pop of Maureen McGovern, with an absurd chorale breakdown evoking the Beach Boys thrown in for good measure. But Williams fails with the flamenco-inflected “Spanish Lessons,” accomplishing the amazing feat of creating something even more embarrassing than the dreaded “La Isla Bonita.”

“‘Yo te quiero’ means I love you/‘Mucho gusto’ means I’m welcome to you/Senorita, I just wanna fall in love,” Madonna sings. Um, Mrs. Ritchie, “mucho gusto” actually means “much pleasure.” But those lines aren’t even the silliest -- that distinction goes to Madonna and Timberlake cooing Bono-like, “Time is waiting/We only got four minutes to save the world/No hesitating/Grab a boy, grab a girl” (“4 Minutes”) -- or the sorriest. My choice for the latter is a tie between two of the many examples of desperate sexual pandering: “My sugar is raw/Sticky and sweet” (“Candy Shop”) and “Got no boundaries and no limits/If there’s excitement, put me in it/If it’s against the law, arrest me/If you can handle it, undress me” (“Give it to Me”).

In any event, as the hate mail always reminds me, nobody listens to Madonna for the lyrics or the singing. It’s all about the giddy grooves, and here they’re once again inspiring enough to make us all believe, as our heroine croons in “Heartbeat,” “Don’t you know, can’t you see, when I dance, I feel free.”

No TrackBacks

TrackBack URL:


Thanks Jim for the good review.

I was never a fan of Madonna in the 80s when I was a teenager, but ever since Ray of Light, (excluding America Life), I have loved her music. Even Music is a cd worth listening to over and over again (when I first got it, it wasn't my favorite, but after a couple of listens, it really grew on me).

She is one of the few artists where I actually buy the cd to give other people a chance to listen to the music.

I myself was blown away by "Devil wouldn't recognise you".

That song means so much to me & if you truely believe Madonna isn't amazing at saying things we'd all love to say but have not been bestowed with her same talent then you seriously need to get off the giddy grooves for a while & really listen to what she speaks about. Yes there's some stuff mixed in there to just dance to & so what....we all love to just dance around don't we...and truthfully when I dance the light shines on me too, & I feel beautiful...& vunerable NO....when I dance I feel free & if you think I'm showing weakness even dancing're so wrong. I am feeling the strongest I ever feel.... I get it totally. Doesn't mean much to some I guess but it means something to me & I know I have to be one of many.

Hard Candy is sexually charged....My sugar is raw....sticky & sweet.....OMG are you kidding me.....come on.... & if thats only from the female perspective I'm all for it.
Way to go rock....don't ever stop.

For me, Hard Candy is not a good album at all. It doesn't have "Madonna's touch". It seems an album like many others...An ordinary album. But hey, we all have bad times in our lives...Maybe Madonna is not in her best time. Let's wait for the next album to see what she will bring to us. I must tell that I am not a fan of Madonna (I don't have idols). I like her songs, some of her concerts (Girlie Show & The Confessions tour are great), I like her style but I do not appreciate things like bullfightings in two of her videos (Take A Bow & You'll See) & the chinchilla's fur coat that she has/had. I am tired to see cruelty with animals & I am sad that Madonna doesn't help them. She doesn't have to help in everything but as she has a big influence in people, I think she should be more responsible for her acts. I really hope to see good changes in all ways...

Really terrible review, American Life is among her most critically lauded album of her career among fans, its sold 6 million copies worldwide which is bigger than Kylies greatest effort Fever!! I hated Confesions for it was nothing like Disco....Hard Candy is in your face unashamed dance, pop, fun with more nodds to disco and her own club roots than any of her previous efforts. To date it has sold 897,983 copies in the UK. More than Like A Virgin, American Life and her debut album. Stop jumping on the band waggon of knocking the woman, and stop acting as if you speak for her fans, you dont!! Its a good album, one that fits with her CV perfectly well.

I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


Leave a comment

About this Entry

This page contains a single entry by Jim DeRogatis published on April 22, 2008 2:16 PM.

Indie rock is where the money's at was the previous entry in this blog.

ALL reunites for Chicago Riot Fest is the next entry in this blog.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.