Ex-Sox pitcher Jim Parque admits using HGH before joining Tampa Bay in 2003.
It's lengthy, but I hope you will read Jim Parque's first-person account of the circumstances that drove him to inject himself with human-growth hormone in a desperate attempt to make it back to the major leagues in 2003. The former Sox left-hander, who started Game 1 of the 2000 AL playoff series against the Seattle Mariners, describes how he injured his shoulder throwing a pitch in that game and never was the same again. After being cut loose by the Sox in 2002, he worried how he would support his family and turned to HGH in a last-ditch effort to stay in the big leagues.
As Sun-Times baseball columnist Chris De Luca writes, Parque has nothing to gain by coming forward now: He wasn't paid for his story, he isn't writing a book and -- unlike today's players who have been accused of using performance-enhancers -- he doesn't need to conjour up a plausible excuse in an effort to avoid suspension. Parque "could have crawled into a hole Mark McGwire-style and nobody would have gone looking for him," De Luca writes. Although Parque's name surfaced in 2007 as part of the Mitchell Report, no one much cared about a pitcher who finished with a 31-34 career record and 5.42 ERA. Questioned by the Sun-Times at that time, Parque denied the allegations.
But Parque, who now runs a Seattle-area baseball academy, didn't want to live with his dark secret any longer. He hopes that by coming clean, young players who hear his story will think twice before "juicing." Parque tells of receiving an unmarked package of needles big enough "for an elephant" and vials of HGH that, although they didn't look like what he had seen on the Internet, he went ahead and injected anyway -- about six times in a bid to make it back with Tampa Bay.
Performance-enhancers are popular because they work: Parque reports that he suddenly felt stronger, threw harder and was able to recover faster after workouts. He made the Tampa Bay roster, but then quit taking the drugs due to a combination of guilt and concern about long-term health effects. His stay in Tampa fizzled out after just five starts, and Parque found himself out of baseball for good after brief flings with the Arizona and Seattle organizations.
Parque doesn't fit the stereotypical image of a "juicer" -- he was neither a muscle-bound slugger nor a fireballing pitcher. He was a slightly built, 5-11 junkballer who tried HGH in hopes of overcoming an injury and reviving his career. His is a cautionary tale about the lengths that many athletes will go to in an effort to remain competitive. If you had been in his shoes, what might you have done? Can you empathize with him?
"Am I living with regret?" Parque writes. "Yes, but by coming forward and telling my story unsolicited, fans can see inside my life and what caused these decisions to be made. ... I hope my story invokes conversation and allows others to speak up and talk about their decisions they once made."
Its a long and very good read. He's got something to gain - his reputation and peace of mind. Not to mention the support his camp will receive as a result of this national coverage. This was not a completely unselfish endeavor. Its still a very good one. I posted the following:
"This story is REAL. I can deal with people that only endanger themselves. I don't agree with wrong on any level - for any reason. I have more respect for this guy vs a drunk driver. Its one thing to kill yourself and quite another to include someone else in that. Anyone getting on this man for being selfish does not understand human nature. Only an enlightened individual learns to live unselfishly. Selfishness is a normal human response. Unselfishness is a spiritual enlightened response."
"To all would be detractors I only ask that you be CONSISTENTLY disgusted with others and other subjects like the crooks who have stolen all of our retirement money and left this country/economy in shambles. People get really angry until its their friend, family member, or favorite party. Then they can understand and empathize. That's what's wrong with people - HYPOCRITES."
This was a good story and I empathize with him, but "empathizing" and "excusing" him are 2 separate things obviously. Bottom line, I respect him for coming out like this. He obviously had a lot of guilt that needed to be released or else it would haunt him for the rest of his life. Unfortunately for some people, especially those that don't exactly have a conscience anymore, can live with such thoughts to their grave (ahem, Roger Clemens). Nothing really surprised me with his story though. I played hoops and football in high school and I even moved on to playing in Big Ten competition at U of Illinois over 20 years ago before I blew out my knees and later foot surgery that pretty much knocked out any aspirations of making sports a career. I understood the dreams of playing professionally and the many people that I've winessed taking shortcuts to make the almighty big bucks or as some would prefer to say, "to make a good living and support the family". In Parque's shoes, assuming he didn't leave anything out in his story, yes, I probably would have done the same thing, but every situation is different as much as it is similar. I remember years ago when certain young athletes were publicly scrutinized for leaving high school or college too early to enter a draft, but now are justified for seizing that opportunity now that may never come again later on. Look, most people won't criticize a person for chasing the $'s by any means possible, but there comes a point where you draw the line between GREED or earning enough to survive. All I know is that the rules and the laws are in place for a reason. You get caught, then face the consequences. Taking the enhancers is still cheating the game no matter what the reasons are for taking it. Even Jim Parque understands this. Good for him. Hopefully, he can finally move on with his life with a peace of mind.
I don't feel sorry for him but I do understand why he did it.
It does not matter if steroids are used to recover from an injury, to revive a career or to push your stats to a whole new level.
It is all about one thing.
The same thing that leads Bud Selig to turn a blind eye to the issue and make excuses.
Money.
Attendance… contracts… incentives… endorsements... it is all about someone getting paid and if they make 10 million a year they will do what ever they have to do to get 20.
Chicks may dig the long ball but it is guys who talk about it and pay to see it.
Well, I admire his courage in "manning up" when there was absolutely nothing to be gained for doing so. I just heard that he wasn't even paid for the Sun-Times article. I agree with Keith's statement that we're all naturally self-centered to varying degrees as well as his inference that we're all naturally hypocrites to varying degrees. Mea culpa!
Jim Parque isn't excused, but certainly forgiven. 'Empathy' differs from 'sympathy' in that the former requires putting yourself in that person's shoes so to speak. Since I've never made a million dollars in a year, never played in the major leagues, never gained fame of that magnitude, it's admittedly difficult to empathize. Either 'sympathy' or 'understanding' are more the words to describe how I feel about the man who's stature I can certainly empathize with as I myself am 5'11 and 185 lbs.
This also helps me forgive and forget what I thought was one of the most feeble performances I had ever witnessed as a baseball fan: Mike Cameron's four home run game in 2002 against the White Sox--the last three of which were against Jim Parque! Mike Cameron? If you look at the list of guys with four home run games throughout baseball history (Lou Gehrig, Mike Schmidt, et al.), Mike Cameron by no means belongs on that list! Granted, I was more upset with Jerry Manuel keeping him in there than with Parque, but JP still held a good deal of my wrath.
Jim, maybe I'll see you around sometime in the Seattle area. If I do, I will go out of my way to shake your hand. Kudos to Jim Parque.
Even for a Sun Times editor, this is a poor effort. Empathy means you have shared or participated in the same experience. Unless your readers have all struggled to stay in the big leagues, the word you wanted was sympathize. I'm sure if it mattered enough you could look it up or maybe check with someone who knows. But I doubt it matters enough to you. Maybe the editor having a blog isn't such a good idea, kind of shows where the weak link is doesn't it?
Stu responds: Kudos to you and Gig for caring enough about proper use of the language to point out my poor choice of words.
NO I CANT EMPATHIZE. Did anyone empathize for Barry Bonds? NO. The whole steroids saga is about Barry and how the bias baseball writers hated him and wrote story after story to make dum fans who never met him hate him too. I never met Barry and no one I know met Barry but they all hate him. Why? No one hates Manny, A-Rod, and most of the other recent cheats. Anyway this guy Parque cheated got paid so what. Release the other one hundred names and lets see who else cheated. I know baseball doesnt want this because they know some so-called good guys are on the list, guys like Parque maybe even Cubs great Kerry Woods(he's only great to Cub fans, everyone else below average and overpaid). Forget this guy and who cares about his story... Please enough what a waste of space in the paper.
Considering that Gig, Griggs and Stu agree and even Mike23 to the meaning of the word empathy & sympathy, no one should ever get upset in the future when none have shared that experience with an individual who decides to give their opinion on a topic.
===
Sympathy vs. Empathy
Sympathy essentially implies a feeling of recognition of another's suffering while empathy is actually sharing another's suffering, if only briefly. Empathy is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes".
Empathy develops into an unspoken understanding and mutual decision making that is unquestioned, and forms the basis of tribal community. Sympathy may be positive or negative, in the sense that it attracts a perceived quality to a perceived self identity, or it gives love and assistance to the unfortunate and needy.
One feels empathy when one has "been there" and sympathy when one hasn't.
==
Now let's see how this last in FCP?
Oh what the heck!
I have sym-empathy for all you guys and girls.
Wouldn't being in the position of losing ones job and making them wonder how they are going to provide for their family regardless of what that job is qualify as being able to put youself in anothers shoes and sharing their suffering therefore empathizing rather than sympathizing with them?
Nope. I can't emphathize.
Gig, I don't get it.
You're a really smart guy.
You live in Seattle.
Why do you like hanging with us?
Bubba's Mom,
First, I know a lot of people way smarter than me and I would hate to think that I couldn't hang with them just because I wasn't in their league intellectually.
Second, I am still a Chicago fan through and through. While I don't hate the Mariners nor the Seahawks, I really don't care what they do except that I've made the Mariners a distant second amongst my favorite teams. If you were to drive up to my house, you'd likely see me building something in the yard while listening to Hall of Famer Dave Niehaus describe Ichiro and his teammates do what they can against whomever on a transistor radio. Nevertheless, if I could hear the Sox broadcast outside, the M's would barely exist. (By the way, did anyone know that if you got on I-90 and kept going west you'd eventually run right into Safeco Field?)
While I have legitimate family here and there in Chi-Town, I consider this blog something of a family in and of itself. I truly enjoy "hanging" with all of you.
Gig I admit that since you've hit the board I've been trying to proof-read before I hit submit, more. It's like I'm trying to please my english teacher and catch myself before I say ain't. Anyway, I think no different about the guy that come cleans anymore than the guy that hasn't. Everyone does their thing for their own reasons and I just live with that. I've said before that when a guy cheats it's for his own benefit. It's for his survival. Halls of Fame are almost extinct as the doo-doo bird. Everyone is selfish just for wanting it. It's an indiviual goal just like getting paid better. Guys don't get paid by tooting their abilities as a team player. It's all about the indiviual results. "My team didn't get 40 homers and 40 stolen bases and became only the 20th guy to do it. I did that. My team was 20 games under .500 and I missed 20 games last year, with only one DL stint. I still was the best player on that team". Does he ask to pay him like everyone else on the team or does he say, "PAY, ME"!!!
Gig, excellent answer. I can EMPATHIZE with you since I also no longer live in the Chi-town viewing area and still have relatives there and am loyal to the teams. Also I don't see what inteligence has to do with who one hangs with especially when blogging. I've sat down to dinner with company presidents and been to biker road rally's. One of my sons is VP of a major NY bank and I had a brother that after getting out of the navy never held a steady job more than 18 months. So to paraphrase Tina Turner.....What's inteligence got to do with it?
Tim, if your son is already a major bank VP, exactly how old are you, dude? haha Is he a basketball fan, by chance? If he is, can he entertain thoughts with his fellow Execs to purchase the Bulls? Please? I don't want to have to pass away from this life cycle knowing that JR is still running as Bulls Chairman at my last breath. I'll never rest in peace that way.
Well Edgar I'll be 58 at the end of next month and my son just turned 31 in June and was made a VP when he was 29. He is currently overseeing his banks Asian operations in Singapore. Yes he is a hoops fan and like many financial execs his aspirations are to become elected to a number of Board of Directors and be out of the day to day hands on banking business by the time he's 45 but believe me if he put his sights on something like becoming the Owner of the Bulls he'd find a way to pull it off and he would not settle for anything less than a perenial play-off contender. He did not go from a computer systems consultant/analyst to a major bank Veep in 8 years by sitting on his hands. Don't get me wrong here, he'd run a team like a business BUT he'd wheel and deal for the best product on the market and make the Boston/Minnesota trade for Garnett look bad. Unlike JR he could own all 5 major sports teams in Chicago and would not be satisfied until he had multiple rings from all 5.
Tim, that's the most frustrating part of all this. How is it that we always get the kind owners we would prefer not having? What is it about Chicago that attracts these people? Has anyone ever thought about the fact that when we magically or mysteriously became fans of our teams (for me, it was definitely inherited), we're probably just kids at that point and dreaming of one of the players on our team becoming a superstar and taking the team to the mountaintop. While it's certainly not as much fun, especially for kids, what we really should be doing is hoping and praying for just the right ownership. When it's all said and done, that's what wins more championships in all sports than any other ingredient--it's the right ownership.
What about recruiting your son to take control of the Bulls...
Gig as sad as it is you're right about how we generally become fans of certain teams. Myself, I was born bleeding Cubbie blue and Bears orange and blue. I added the Bulls and Hawks myself but then passed all of them on to both my sons and my daughter. And believe me I have on more than one occasion told my son that he and his older brother should look into forming a group of professionals and attempt to buy the Bulls or at least controlling interest.
Tim that is awesome! Everyday must feel like Christmas for you! My son is 8 and sometimes I wonder about him! I hope your son takes over all of these Chicago Teams!!! But if we can just get him to the Bulls that would be enough!
Gig is right - how can you build anything on an unstable foundation?
I have 3 girls, all under the age of 5. And believe me, I already can tell that none of them will be the next Lisa Leslie of the WNBA or Jenny Finch of U.S.A. softball, let alone an owner of a sports franchise. lol But then again, Jennifer Lopez is co-owner or minority shareholder, however you want to say it, of the Miami Dolphins so hmmmm...
ALL UNDER 5!! Edgar you have my sympathies. I didn't really want daughters because they would've been raised Amish. My two boys are my world and I'm hoping that they do something special with their lives. Books are a start. School is a priority. They are 15 and 2. Weird numbers but I make sure that they are close.
Thanks WRD. I obviously need all the sympathies I can get! It's not like I wanted all girls, but that's not for me to criticize. Now you get an idea why I post a lot in FCP? It's also not like I can talk sports often in a home full of females! lol
I know what you mean Edgar. I raised a step daughter and we are still close. She is somewhat into sports but not enough to hold a conversation. And she does not like the Bears like that. I think she was rebelling against me. My ex-father in law had all girls and he is very into my youngest son because he kept trying for a son and never got it. My youngest seems to like all sports. He actually acts like me during games. I get loud and raucous when my Bears are on. My oldest wants to play but he has got to put the playstation 3 remote down a little more for that to happen.
Oh my girls and the wife don't mind if I watch football and hoops (they basically have no choice when it comes to my Bulls because I come from a family of basketball players and coaches), but I'll get the proverbial "rolling eyes" when I try to sneak in baseball, hockey and fight night Saturdays. Gotta compromise somewhere I guess, but the moment I start talking about "inside sports" involving salaries, press conferences, trades, free agents, etc... oh brother, I'll be lucky if I even get the sleeper sofa to sleep on at night. Time to log on FCP and then rant in there or head on out to meet up with the fellas at the local sports bar! haha
Um, I love my wife, but there's a problem when it comes to sports. It's more than simply not being INTO them, it's that she understands virtually nothing about ANY of them! For example, I had to teach her about baseball from the bottom up. If all the way up is the top of Sears Tower (forget that new name!), she's now stuck between ground level and floor 1. She used to think that the batter had a choice of whether to run to first, second or third, but did on her own eliminate second because the pitcher was in the way! So, that's my "sporting life with wife." It's a good thing that she actually somewhat likes baseball as it's my favorite, but can't tolerate for one second anything else! She knows that I don't get to watch too many Hawks or Bears games, so she'll let me be for the most part. And, thank God for DVR!
I've never had a significant other who liked sports I was really into. My ex-wife hated when the Bears were on. I got too into it. My ex-girlfriend did get me into the Bulls but not deep enough to stay into them. She really knew the sport. She'd call the violations and travels and everything else before the refs. That was a turn on. She actually watched the NFL draft for me one year. Practically the whole draft. Dangit! How did I let her go? That was a woman.
WRD, let me try to answer your last question this way... First of all, I agree, there is a sort of turn on if your partner happens to also be an attractive athlete, but I'm not too sure how long that would last. Now I'm no relationship expert by any means, but I've always found it strange to talk too much sports with a woman. It usually feels like that they seem interested, but deep inside, they really don't want to hear it. WRD, when you said that your ex used to watch the NFL Draft more than you, are you certain that she didn't enjoy watching more of the highlight videos of the jocks in action rather than the actual draft statistics, team strategies and stories? LOL Now to formally answer your question, maybe you wanted a little more "femininity" (is that a real word? you know what I mean though) from a lady partner? haha
No she didn't watch NFL drafts, she watched one that I was interested in (I had to work)and later said that she wish she could have those 7 hours back. She wasn't that much of a fan. Oh and she was a woman's woman. The kind that goes home to do number 2. It's just that my favorite sport has never been enjoyed by any woman that I dated. And I've had female friends who are good looking who knows football. It's cute that you can go back and forth a little. This one lady I know is Ms. Prim and proper she was a big Eddie George fan. She also liked Ray Lewis. Go figure.
I see I have been slumming in those other threads! Its good to know all of this down to earth stuff about Edgar. I would love to watch a Bears game with William and a Bulls game with Edgar. You each have the true passion and knowledge of each. My wife hates sports and she rolls her eyes every time I am watching. I just put my head down. I turn it off if she asks. She likes Tyler Perry and Bette Midler and those lifetime movies! I ask her all the time HOW DID WE END UP TOGETHER??? All in fun though. We both are wise crackers. I have a 8 year old son and a 13 yo daughter. And they don't like watching either. My son loves X Box. He hasn't graduated to the PS3 and Wii and all of that yet. I just cannot afford it. I hate running into girls that know sports (I work with one - and she is fine). It is a big turn-on. William you had something man. I can't even watch an NFL draft. My wife has 5 sisters and all of them had daughters. Before my son was born I was in that ALL WOMEN and girls world. And they were always at my place. My son came along and broke that streak. And they spoiled him rotten. My brother in law just had a son last year. He is the newest prince of the family. My son has gravitated towards me. We do our thing in obscurity while the ladies have a party around us.
Come on, Keith... your wife really likes Tyler Perry, Bette Midler and Lifetime movies? Not that there's anything wrong with that, but that is an odd favorite collection. It's almost like saying that you enjoy watching both the One Tree Hill CW and the BET channels religiously. Are you sure you're not just trying to kiss a** to the general population here? hehehe Alright man, I need a boy in this household now. The wife and I both haven't broken the age 40 barrier yet, so we're still good to go. I need someone to eventually take me over in the FCP presses when I retire from the typing because no way the girls will ever get into this!
Edgar - she like anything that has some drama - and women in it. We can't STAND BET. Neither of us. Edgar - um older than you. That just does not seem right. And for the record - you will still be good to go after 40. I don't know about your girls - sometimes there's a prodigy. There is that one that will love what you love. My daughter attended the Sox game with me yesterday and WORE her Sox Pink for me!!! I teared up. She did that for me. She's a typical 13yo girl. Wild fashion, TALKING (as if it were a sport), the computer and tv. NO SPORTS.
William I really appreciate that you are a vocal Bears fan. I grew up with 5 brothers and we were ALL loud and physical about the Bears. We used to line up and toss the football before and after games. Everybody wanted to be Payton or Vince Evans. I kick it with a bunch of church guys now and I am too roudy for them. I get hyped up!!! Fist pumps, Hi Fives, Smack talking, Chest Bumps and touch down dances. And lots and lots of anger for stupid plays, bad calls and loses. Bears brought a lot of closeness for my family. Wonderful times. The only time I can get that hype is when I visit one of them. I have a Bulls buddy, but he is still too cool for me. He LOVES the NBA, but is chill.
Keith, my 4 brothers and I were not even remotely close growing up watching games together. We are each fans now and really I didn't know they were fans until we were grown and gone. I didn't get into the Bears until I saw one of those pregame shows and they were showing Walter running in slo-mo with "Nobody does in better" as the background music. I was INSTANTLY a fan and watched every game after that until I went into the Army in 83. I missed almost all the games during my stint in Germany and did catch a few in 85 when I was stationed at FT. Meade Maryland. I used to try to play at West Pullman park growing up. I went to Julian ,class of 82, when they were winning city championships in the late 70s/early 80s. Tried out but was really too laid back to deal with those prima donnas who had played. I could hold my own but wasn't fast and got beat up playing so hard, a lot. I want my 15 year old to play but he doesn't even watch. He says he'd like to but I don't see it. He is finishing up his summer two weeks with me and he stayed on ps3. Barely stepped outside. We have a birthday party to go to today and I tell people he's going to step outside likes those prisoners who get out of the hole and squint hard. That's my boy. I'm wondering how my new neighbors will deal with me this season. I have somewhat of a language barrier with most of them and I just smile a lot because people don't like you when you do otherwise. I'm a LOUD watcher. I get my excercise watching the Bears. I catch myself cussing a lot when they are messing up and apologize to my son because that's the only time he hear me cuss.
HGH or somatotropin is produced by the pituitary gland at the base of the brain. This hormone is one of the most important hormones of the human body. Every organ of the human body is dependent on HGH for proper growth and functioning.