Hey "aughts", I'mma let you finish, but 2009 has to be one of the craziest years of all-time! Think of all the wacky stuff that has happened in the last 11 months. Vampires became our country's mythological creature of choice by a shockingly wide margin. Twitter took over the world seemingly overnight. Tom Delonge and Mark Hoppus kissed and made up. Full Court Press lost not one but two editors. The Taco Bell dog died. And, oh yeah, let's not forget about whatever the hell happened during Michael Jackson's funeral.

This year has been wild. Insane, I tell you. The madness has even hit Chicago sports.

Never mind losing out on the Olympics, I'm more concerned about the damn-near-epic fall from grace that inflicted nearly all of our city's sports superstars. Alfonso Soriano put in, by far, the worst year of his career. Carlos Quentin went from a potential MVP candidate to a guy you expect to injure himself when he gets out of bed in the morning. Brian Urlacher missed an entire season with a wrist injury. Patrick Kane - tiny, innocent Patrick Kane - inexcusably beat up a Buffalo cab driver over 20 cents. Jay Cutler actually has some fans wishing for the return of Kyle Orton.

This brings us to the recent struggles of Derrick Rose.

If I see one "Yeah, but they played the Kings! Without Kevin Martin!" comment, I swear to Walter Payton that I won't approve it. I don't care if it comes against the Lakers or if it comes against a team as woeful as Sacramento: for the Bulls, any win on the infamous Circus Trip is a reason to celebrate.

So, before we get any further, let's all take a second to commemorate the Bulls' unthinkable 1-0 start on the Road Trip From Hell by doing the Brad Miller taunt.

We make a far bigger deal of the Bulls' 2010 free agent Armageddon around these parts, but let's not forget that the stakes for our Blackhawks could be even higher once this season ends. While the Bulls need to add a player to turn into a contender, the 'Hawks are already there. All the good team has to do is keep the players it already has. This, of course, is much easier said than done.

The 'Hawks have reached their current status among the league's elite teams by shelling out lots and lots of cash. They've given mammoth contracts to free agents (Huet, Campbell, Hossa) and rewarded their own players (Seabrook, Byfuglien). This is all fine and dandy, or at least it was while cornerstones Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews worked off rookie contracts.

I really enjoyed my Bears-less Sunday. How about you? There was no anxiety, no swearing, no facepalming. The text message inbox on my cell phone didn't explode. The Earth continued to rotate.

I would honestly love to ignore the Bears here right now. I said my peace on Thursday, and I don't have much else to add. The 2009 Bears are eternally atrocious, and they aren't worth the stress that comes with trying to write a well thought out rip job.

I kind of just want to throw my hands in the air and give up. Perhaps I'll even waive them like I just don't care. The Bears have sucked the sports life out of me, and I don't think I'm alone. They have made this shockingly warm Chicago autumn at least 60 percent less enjoyable. The Bears, as always, have pretty much ruined everything.

Alas, I know that we can't just ignore the Bears and give 100 percent of our blog time to talking about how cool Brad Miller is. We must soldier on and continue to complain about them, even if apathy would feel better at this point. The Bears are just too damn important in this city. If the players and coaches cared half as much as the rest of us do...

Alright, time to suck it up. Let's talk Bears, people. I have some questions to ask, after the jump.

Virtually every media outlet is playing up the "Lovie Smith is fighting for his job!" angle before tonight's Bears-49ers game. It's an obvious storyline, and - with bloggers and sports talk radio callers kicking the "Fire Lovie" campaign into overdrive this week - it's obviously relevant. The only problem is that the thesis of these stories really isn't all that true.

I touched on it on Monday, but it's worth repeating: Lovie Smith isn't going anywhere, at least not after this season. That's not to say that he doesn't deserve to be fired (something I don't think is necessary, but I certainly wouldn't be against it). The problem, of course, is that Smith still has two years and $11 million left on his contract after this season ends. Do you really think the Bears are going to eat that money, and then shell out big bucks for another high profile coach? The Bears aren't owned by Paul Allen or Mark Cuban. They're owned by the McCaskey family. Let's just say that the Bears don't exactly have a long history swallowing millions when they really don't have to.

Baseball still screws up its awards far too often (more on that in a bit) but we should give them credit when they get one right, and today they got one right. After years of stellar defense, Mark Buehrle was finally honored with a Gold Glove.

It leaves me wondering how Buehrle was able to breakthrough after all these years. It's not like his defense in 2009 was noticeably better than it has been the last few seasons. Do you have to throw a perfect game to win a Gold Glove? Was it only because Mike Mussina is now out of the picture? Are the voters - in this case, managers and coaches - actually getting smarter!?

The answer key to those questions: 1) "probably", 2) "probably", and 3) "of course not".

It's understandable if you're a bit underwhelmed by the way the 'Hawks have started the season. After going to the Western Conference Finals last year, most expected the 'Hawks to pick up where they left off, and continue to set the league on fire. Through the first 16 games, that hasn't exactly happened: though they're leading the Central Division, four Western Conference teams have more points, and four more teams have just as many (20).

There are reasons for this, of course. After staying remarkably healthy last season, the injury bug has bit the 'Hawks hard so far. We knew Marian Hossa would be gone until the winter, but Jonathan Toews, Dave Bolland, Adam Burish, and Ben Eager have also missed time. Some will continue to miss time.

Still, the 'Hawks are beginning to get healthy, and it showed last night in a 4-1 victory over the Kings. Jeremy Roenick, Sega Genesis, NHL '94, and "Swingers" not included.

Even all these hours after that train wreck of a game against the Cardinals mercifully ended, I'm still left trying to figure out how the Bears got to this point. Did they ruin their karma during the bye week? Was a second straight gut-wrenching loss in Atlanta too much to take? Did Cedric Benson single-handidly kill the team's will to live? I don't know, and I'm not sure anyone does. The Bears weren't always this bad, though.

There was a time - just a quarter ago, in the coach's mind - when they were 3-1 and the league was their oyster. Not anymore. The second quarter of this season has been a disaster: a stomach punch loss against the Falcons, a pair of blowout defeats against teams that aren't even that good, and one of the most unsatisfying three touchdown victories you'll ever see. The Bears are quite awful right now, and it's hard to imagine them beating anyone outside of Detroit and St. Louis the rest of this season.

It's hard to take much satisfaction in a too-close-for-comfort victory over a Michael Redd-less Bucks team, but you still have to win and on Tuesday night, the Bulls were able to do just that. As Vin Diesel once put it: "It doesn't matter if you win by a second or a mile, winning is winning."

Jason McKie (left) celebrates with Matt Forte after one of Forte's two TDs.

Rarely in the NFL's hallowed history has a 30-6 victory looked less impressive or drawn more boos from a victorious home crowd than what we witnessed Sunday at Soldier Field.

Talk about ugly: The Bears came out in their Halloween orange (not the most appropriate look on a day you're honoring Walter Payton) and played uninspired offensive football, especially in the red zone. But thanks to the absolute ineptitude of the Browns' offense (five giveaways leading to 20 Bears points), Lovie & Co. get a badly needed bounce-back victory.

The Bears can't afford to fumble their chance to beat up on an NFL patsy.

As we've discussed, it's the year of the blowout in the NFL. We know that Vegas bookies are taking a bath as one creampuff after another gets trounced by double-digit margins. Hard to believe there are still three winless teams (the Rams and Buccaneers at 0-7, the Titans at 0-6). Among the teams with only one victory are the Cleveland Browns, who visit Soldier Field on Sunday. Just what the Bears need: a truly awful opponent.

But the way the Bears were outclassed Sunday, you could argue they have "awful" potential themselves. Lovie Smith has stressed that the 45-10 shellacking in Cincinnati was just one game, and the bookies are expecting a big bounce-back this weekend. How about you?

Vinny Del Negro's Bulls will seek to improve on their 41-41 record of last season.

UPDATE: Last chance, Bulls fans: Get your prediction in before tonight's tipoff against the Spurs -- how many wins for the Bulls this season and how far do they advance in the playoffs? So far, we have Tim as the leading optimist with 55 wins and a possible Eastern finals berth. Drew (54) and RPK (53, 2nd-round exit) are close behind, followed by Villano (51, 2nd round), Seedy (48), Keith (46, 1st round), Tim Little (45, 2nd round), Qumar (43) and then Hitman and yours truly at 42 (hey, Hitman, we finally agree on something!). Get your prediction in by 7 p.m. Central and we'll see who was right come April.

By popular demand -- OK, by Edgar's demand -- we present our Bulls' season preview post, in which we solicit your predictions on what their final regular-season record will be and how far you foresee them advancing in the playoffs.