I just passed the reputable American magazine Smithsonian over to my English teacher friend Simon to get an opinion about an article by novelist Richard Ford. Simon liked the article, but what he found most interesting was a sentence bearing the phrase: "who're said to have perfected the home concept."
"I've never seen the phrase 'who're' before," Simon said. "I'm not sure it's a legal contraction."
He handed the magazine to his girlfriend Julia, who peered at "who're" skeptically. Julia is also a teacher, although she teaches Year 3 (our second grade).
"I teach contractions in Year 3," she said, "and I'd mark that off. It's not a contraction."
"Yes, it is!" I protested. "I see it all of the time, and use it, as well."
"Well, then," announced Miss Julia, "it's a cultural contraction."
"You are allowed to use it," she continued, in her best shrill, schoolteacher voice, "but among the English, saying 'who're' would be like eating everything with tomato ketchup and holding forks in the right hand."
She gave a melodramatic gasp.
"No, no, that would never do," she finished.
I protested this statement, for while I do hold my fork in my right hand and only pick up my knife to cut something (as do all Americans with proper etiquette, unlike those European Continenal diners who eat with both hands, forks firmly in left and knives firmly in right), I do not eat everything with ketchup poured on top.
Except for my chips (French fries). But at least I don't eat them with mayonnaise.
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