The art of doughnut bouncing

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How to describe The Encyclopedia of Immaturity (Klutz Press, 410 pages, $19.95). First of all, the title, the heft and the cover photo of the "Mona Lisa" with a Sharpie-drawn mustache and glasses, and an arrow through her head, drew me to it...

Encyclopedia of Immaturity

The table of contents is four pages long, giving curious readers plenty of stupid immature activities to choose from:

On page 150, you can learn how to make a footsicle. Figure out how old you are in fly lifetime on page 51. Tie a cherry stem in a knot while it's inside your mouth; make a napkin bikini top; bounce a doughnut; smash a grape through your head; learn the official rules of Jinx!

The pages I earmarked:

How to Make Noises Under Your Arm: I could never do it as a kid (only one girl in my neighborhood could) and thought I might give it another try by following the 8-step diagram. Still can't do it.

How Do You Say 'Poop' in Postdam? "Bais" — that's how (people in Potsdam speak German). In Icelandic, it's kukur; in HIndi, tatti; in Slovene, drek; in Korean, ddong, and in Farsi, aiee.

Make Duct Tape Underpants: I didn't try this because there are no instructions, only a photograph. It's funny. What's next — duct tape bikini wax?

Carve a Barfkin: What's a Barfkin, you ask? It's a barfing pumpkin, silly. This is the most practical suggestion in the whole book if you ask me, and timely, as Halloween is just around the corner.

The outtakes (items cut for space) make me think there's a Volume II in the offing. Here are some of the things left out:

How to Pick Locks
How to Burp on Command
How to Play Mumblety-Peg
How to Start the Hiccups
How to Hypnotize People

Have fun reverting back to immaturity — or keep on keeping on if you're already there!

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If I could attach the picture of the "barfing pumpkin" I have on my screen saver I would. I love it. I may make one this year for my porch.

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This page contains a single entry by Teresa Budasi published on October 25, 2007 7:34 AM.

'Fair is foul, and foul is fair' was the previous entry in this blog.

The nose knows is the next entry in this blog.

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