Ode to Robby Benson

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Remember Robby Benson? He of the big, blue eyes, baby-smooth skin and sensitive voice? He of the big screen tear-jerkers "Ice Castles," "One on One," "Ode to Billy Joe" ... TV's "The Death of Richie," anyone?

Benson disappeared from the public eye after a while and spent most of his post-Tiger Beat years behind the camera, doing voiceover work and directing sitcoms. Now he's gone and written a novel, Who Stole the Funny? (Harper Entertainment, 349 pages, $13.95) ...

Who Stole The Funny

... a roman a clef about the making of a sitcom called — get this, from perhaps the lily-whitest of all the former teen heartthrobs — "I Love My Urban Buddies."

Interspersed throughout the narrative — which follows director J.T. Baker, who must take over directing "Urban Buddies" after the original director accidentally shoots himself in the head with a nail gun — are little breakouts with "Hollywood Dictionary" entries. Many are terms we've all come to recognize in this age of Hollywood insider programming ("table read," "live feed," "honcho"), but here are a couple I'd never heard of:

"Marcus Pooley": A penis with no balls.
"Sammy Glick": A nice Marcus Pooley.

It's a quick whip-through read, with clipped dialogue, fast-paced scenes and exaggerated, stereotypical characters you'd expect in a behind-the-scenes look at a sitcom.

Note: Back in the day, I personally felt Robby Benson was a little too sensitive, bordering on effeminate. But hey, look at him now — all shaggy hair and goatee. Totally my type!

Robbie Benson

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omigod... he IS dreamy! And all the more attractive because he has gone and written a novel instead of starred in a whiny reality show about how he's 45 and not married. (Actually he's probably closer to 50, right?)

I loved your take on Robby, it cracked me up!!

Oh wow. I've had a crush on Robby since I was about 11 and saw him in Jory. I seriously thought I'd grow up and marry him. And look at him now, can I pick 'em or what???

And I just published my first novel too, with my husband, who is just a s good looking and sweet as Robby.

Robby Benson forever

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