What follows is Glenn Beck's apology to Brian Urlacher, as lifted from the Fox News website. Here's the link: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,597622,00.html
I've told you before that I lead with my mistakes, so let me start there. A lot of media have called for a comment on this so we know it must be important.
During a segment about myself being named one of the "blackest white folks we know" by the website theroot.com, I made a few comments about some others on the list. Now, I know absolutely nothing about sports, so I didn't realize that one of them was NFL star Brian Urlacher.
Since then, I have been informed by my staff that Brian -- uh, Mr. Urlacher -- could kill me with his thumb in nine seconds if he wanted to. Although if we are talking about people in Chicago wanting to beat me up, he's going to have to stand in a very long line.
Anyway, I apologize to anyone who was offended. I just made a neo-Nazi joke based on the short hair and white skin; I don't actually think he has fascist plans to take over the Earth.
In the same segment I called James Carville an alien. Again I apologize. I am not a "Carville Earther" and think he was actually born on Earth and has absolutely no tentacles or ability to fire lasers from his eyes.