Chicago Sun-Times

Bears Interview DeBord

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Seahawks tight ends coach Mike DeBord interviewed with the Bears for a similar position on Tuesday, according to a source knowledgeable with the situation.

The Seahawks hired DeBord as an assistant offensive line coach before the 2008 season and moved him to tight ends before last season. Before arriving in Seattle, DeBord was a longtime Michigan assistant before serving as Central Michigan's head coach from 2000-03. He returned to Michigan in 2004 and spent two years as offensive coordinator and tight ends coach.
The source said recently hired Bears offensive line coach Mike Tice also sat in on the interview with head coach Lovie Smith.
DeBord has been credited with developing former Notre Dame tight end John Carlson, who caught 51 passes for 574 yards and seven touchdowns last season.

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So Tice is sitting in on the coaching interviews. So maybe this just means Lovie knows nothing about offense and wanted a guy with offensive experience in their with him telling him what is right and wrong. Or Tice is the new OC, just hasn't been named yet.

Now in a recent interview with Tice he described his interview in detail.

Lovie: Hi, hey your not Mike Tyson?
Tice: No I am Mike Tice, I am here to interview for the offensive line job.
Lovie: Oh, DAMN! Well sit down anyway and tell me a little about what you do.
Tice: Well, I have been a TE coach, O-line coach and a head coach.
Lovie: The head coaching position is not available hot shot you here me, I AM THE BOSS! Who's your daddy, WHO'S YOUR DADDY?
Tice: No I am just here for the line job.
Lovie: We already have my BFF Rod the Bod Marinelli. HE'S THE BEST, YOU HERE THE BEST.
Tice: No offensive line.
Lovie: (Steers into sapce for several minutes, then throws a challenge flag) Are you saying your here for the offensive line job?
Tice: Yes
Lovie: What happened to Hiestand?
Tice: You fired him
Lovie: COWBOY UP!!
Tice: What?
Lovie: YoYo Ma!
Tice: Yeah, ok.
Lovie: Who are you AGAIN?
Tice: I am Mike Tice I am here for the open, and fully available offensive line coaching job.
Lovie: You any good? At checkers? GRUDEN'S PANTS ARE TO TIGHT! Hahaha WOW.
Tice: Well I am pretty good at getting the running game going, but my lines tend to struggle in pass protection. They have been giving up about 40 sacks a season, but........
Lovie: Did you say 40 SACKS a season, my god thats awsome I love A GOOD SACK, we can use all the sacks we can get around here. You my friend are hired. Mike Tyson assistant defensive line coach. Not only are you hired but you will get a 5 million dollar bonus if you can get us 40 sacks.
Tice: Really? Yeah f### it I'll do it.
Lovie: The BUCS are going to the Super Bowl baby. I AM A PIRATE A BIG BAD PIRATE AND I WANT SOME SUPER BOWL BOOTY!
Tice: (mumbles to self) they may have a better shot than we do.
Tice: I think I will just head down and meet some of the Players
Lovie: OK later Tyson, I hate to see you go but I love to watch you leave.
Tice: What, never mind I don't want to know
Lovie: Throws a challenge flag as Tice walks away.
Moments later
Rod: (Crawls out from under Lovies desk) He notice anything?
Lovie: No pookey are secret is safe. Lets go see what Bob is doing.

Hey Creighton,

You know what would have been funnier to read than that fake interview you wrote?

An interview that actually sounds like it might have happened (hence, a better use of satire and not so much illogical dialogue) and an interview with words spelled correctly.

MEMO to Joe Felicelli: Mike DeBord is 'YOUR" kind of guy!

Mike DeBord would be a 'REAL' pickup for the Bears. While, DeBord migt not have been the world's greatest head coach at CMU or offensive coordinator at Michigan, DeBord is an 'expert' at teaching the run game, blitz pickup, pulling, finding mobile athletes, and is a 'PRO LEVEL' offensive line and tight end coach. Especially, combo, chip, and double team blocking.

And, he would be great to assist the new OC, Mike Tice and helping Greg Olsen and Kellen Davis to become better blockers.

BTW: Check out my link below, I suggested in the NBC5Chicago "Super Fans" blog in December, 2007 that the Bears should consider DeBord as an offensive consultant. (And, also I suggested getting rid of Ron Turner)

This offense is going to look so dysfunctional that we should watch the games just to watch an offensive breakdown. Lovie and Jerry here are simply shooting darts blindfolded and hoping to hit the bullseye. So next they'll be hitting up a qb coaches assistant for the OC. Ah the future scene of an inevitable train wreck.

A real coversation between Creighton and his roommate.

Creighton's mommy: Creighton! Your almost 50 years old for christ's sake. When are you going to move out and when are you going to get a job for once in your life!?

Creighton: Not now mom I'm blogging. These guys on the sports blog really respect my point of view and everyone loves what I post. Sheesh.

Mommy: (trying to contain her laughter) Son, do you have any real friends even? I mean if your not bloging then your playing your xbox and where has that goten you?

Creighton: Are you stupid mom? I'm trying to build a dynasty on franchise mode. God your such a looser.

Mommy: Whatever,. I'm goingf to the kitchen.

Greighton: Oh and can you bring me some cheezy poofs!

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This page contains a single entry by Neil Hayes published on January 19, 2010 7:28 PM.

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